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Laura Hooper, Northridge, CA Vendor: Calligraphy Website: Laura Hooper Calligraphy About Me: I've been practicing the art of calligraphy since the age of 12 and nothing gives me more pleasure than waking up each morning knowing I get to do what I do each day. I love having the ability to infuse my own personal style into each of my bride's special day. When I'm not working, I enjoy traveling, hiking, reading and painting; but most of the time I don't consider calligraphy to be work at all!
About Laura @ Laura Hooper Calligraphy

Jane_Hill

{Envelopes in Bickham Script with dropped zip codes}

Properly addressing your envelopes is such an enormous task, and brides often have no idea where to start and thus can become overwhelmed. I thought it might be helpful to include some tips on some of the most common envelope addressing situations.

There are many ways to address your envelopes appropriately based on the marital status, family status or living arrangements of your guests. Please keep in mind that these “etiquette” tips vary by the source, and only you can decide how you want to address your envelopes. For a comprehensive guide you may want to take a look at Crane's Blue Book of Stationery, Crane's Wedding Blue Book, or the latest editions of Emily Post's Etiquette and Emily Post's Wedding Etiquette.

Here are several examples to get you started:

Common Addressing Situations

Married couple formal:
Outer: Mr. and Mrs. Micah Cohen
Inner: Mr and Mrs. Cohen

Married couple informal:
Outer: Loren and Dina Nelson
Inner: Loren and Dina

Married couple formal, children under 18 living at home:
Outer: Mr. and Mrs. Karl Carter
Inner: Mr. and Mrs. Karl Carter
Miss Zoe Carter

Married couple informal, children under 18 living at home:
Outer: Aaron and Caycee Polun
Inner: Aaron and Caycee
Eliana

Married couple, different last names:
Outer: Ms. Ariana Rothstein Fisch-Field (and) Mr. Greggory Field
Inner: Ms. Rothstein Fisch-Field (and) Mr. Field

Married couple, both are doctors, different last names:
Outer: Doctor Christina Yang
(and) Doctor Preston Burke
Inner: Doctor Yang
(and) Doctor Burke

Married couple, both are doctors, same last name:
Outer: Doctor Derek Sheperd (and) Doctor Meredith Sheperd
Or: The Doctors Sheperd
Inner: The Doctors Sheperd

Married couple, wife is a doctor (with or without different last names):
Outer: Doctor April King (and) Mr. Arthur Flores
Inner: Doctor King
(and) Mr. Flores
**Note** It is never EVER correct to write Mr. and Dr. King if both spouses share a last name.

Married couple, husband is a judge (same rules apply for the woman as above with the doctor scenario):
Outer: The Honorable and Mrs. Edward Adams
Inner: The Honorable and Mrs. Adams

Wife is a judge:
Outer: The Honorable Jocelyn Stone and Mr. Edward Stone
Inner: Judge Stone and Mr. Stone

Single woman, with or without guest:
Outer: Miss/Ms. Nichole Lewis
Inner: Miss/Ms. Nichole Lewis
Or: Miss Lewis and Guest
or Miss Lewis Mr. Cordero

Single man:
Outer: Mr. George Eddington III
Inner: Mr. Eddington
Or Mr. Eddington and Guest
Or Mr. Eddington
(and Ms. Hooper)

Divorced woman:
Outer: Mrs./Ms. Pamela Higgins
Inner: Mrs./Ms. Higgins

Widow:
Outer: Mrs. Robert Louis Schreck

Inner: Mrs. Schreck

Couple living together:
Outer: Ms. Diana Gelberg
Mr. Alan Dabach
Inner: Ms. Gelberg
Mr. Dabach
(List first whomever in the couple you know better; if you know both equally well, list the woman first)

Two adult males living together as a couple (alphabetically in this case, or by personal preference). Adult male roommates should each get their own invite:
Outer: Mr. Ryan Alvarez
Mr. Michael Stevens
Inner: Mr. Alvarez
Mr. Stevens

Two adult females living together as a couple (alphabetically, or by personal preference in this case) Adult female roommates should each get their own invite:
Outer: Miss/Ms. Rachel Michaelson
Miss/Ms. Marybeth Adams
Inner: Miss/Ms. Michaelson
Miss/Ms. Adams

More Addressing Tips:
Courtesy titles may be abbreviated, such as Mr., Mrs., but Doctor should be spelled out (unless they are a Ph.D., in which case abbreviating is acceptable).

Initials should not be used for middle names. Leave them in or out. However, if a guest never uses his or her first given name, do not use it in the address. An initial is acceptable here.

Remember that if you choose to include middle names on your envelopes, there may be an extra charge from your calligrapher, as the extra word does take more time to write.

For formal invitations, abbreviations should not be used for Street, Drive, Avenue, Apartment, or for cities and states. Abbreviations can be appropriate for informal invitations. Street numbers under 10 should be written out.

Numbered street names should only be spelled out if they are under ten. If it is your preference to spell out numbered street names over ten there is most likely going to be an added charge so do inquire about this with your calligrapher.

Children and guest escorts should not be mentioned on outer envelope, unless you are using single envelopes only. If you know who your guest will be bringing, include their name in your address. Children over the age of 18 that are still living at home should each receive their own invitation. Adults not romantically involved and living in the same household should each receive their own invitation.

It is not appropriate to address envelopes as “Mr and Mrs John and Jane Adams.” If you feel the need to include both man and woman's names, address as Jane and John Adams. To receive an entire list addressed this way does take a considerable amount of extra time to write and may often increase the fee for your calligraphy.

Remember when ordering from any calligrapher, read their guidelines carefully and ask questions if needed. My own personal policy is to write everything as you provide it to me to prevent miscommunication. Therefore, if you abbreviate, your envelopes will be abbreviated and so forth….even state names, so spell it all out!

There are so many different ways to address your envelopes, so if you ever have any questions, feel free to inquire!

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29 Responses to “Envelope Addressing Tips”

1.
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Guest
Habibi

Great post, thanks! I’ve got one for you though: how do you address an invite to a married couple where the husband is a judge and the wife is a doctor?

 
2.
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Newport Nuptials

We have lots of guests with different titles and living situations, so this post is extremely helpful!

My sister is in the invitation process right now and we have been talking about wording for both the addresses and the actual invite, do you have any tips on wording invites? The brides parents are divorced, and the groom’s mother is deceased. Both sets of parents and the couple are contributing to the wedding. Thanks!

 
3.
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Becky

Thanks for this post! It is going to be very helpful. I looked at my guest list, and started changing all the state abbreviations to the actual names and came across Washington, DC. Do I leave it as “DC” or do I spell out District of Columbia? Thanks!

 
4.
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anon

“If you feel the need to include both man and woman’s names, address as Jane and John Adams. ”

So are you saying that the only way to not refer to a woman as Mrs. (which some women today find offensive) is to address them informally without titles?

 
5.
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anon

Huh, my comment got cut off. I meant not refer to a woman as Mrs. husband’s-full-name (which some find offensive)

 
6.
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Laura @ Laura Hooper Calligraphy (message)  22 posts, Newbee

@Becky: It’s perfectly acceptable either way. I favor spelling it out. If you have small envelopes, often I will spell it out and drop the zipcode to the next line.

 
7.
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Laura @ Laura Hooper Calligraphy (message)  22 posts, Newbee

@anon: I am not sure I understand — if the woman has taken her husband’s last name she should be addressed as Mrs.
Formally speaking, if she has not taken his last name, you would put her as Ms. with her own maiden name. Then they would both have titles.

 
8.
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Laura @ Laura Hooper Calligraphy (message)  22 posts, Newbee

@Habibi: What a power couple! You should address it as
The Honorable John Smith
Doctor Jane Doe (or Smith, according to her lastname)

 
9.
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AliCherri1

Thanks! This is a very helpful post :)

 
10.
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rzblna

Out of curiosity, you said that it is never proper to say “Mr. and Dr. King” if they share a last name. What would be the proper way?
“Dr. and Mr. King”? Or “Dr. King and Mr. King”?

 
11.
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Laura @ Laura Hooper Calligraphy (message)  22 posts, Newbee

@rzblna: Yes that is never proper and I cringe when I see that, I know other calligraphers do too.
It should read Doctor Jane King and Mr Martin King.

 
12.
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kms

I have a lot of friends that live in apartments but they typically write their address as: [street name] #11. Do you write the “#” sign or would you change it to “Apartment 11″?

Thanks!

 
13.
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Megan

@kms: I spelled out “Apartment 11″ on my invites and three came back from NYC guests. As soon as I abbreviated, it was delivered. I was blown away by that!

 
14.
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Laura @ Laura Hooper Calligraphy (message)  22 posts, Newbee

@kms: Because # could be shorthand for a condo, as well as an apartment, you can write out the word Number instead of Apartment. You can also write out Unit as well. If you are addressing your envelopes informally you can just write # or No.

@Megan: Yes the USPS does some nutty things sometimes. If anyone ever has any questions about the address you can simply go to USPS.com and click on Look Up Zipcode (its usually at the top left). If you type in the address (with or without the zip) it will tell you what type of building it is.

 
15.
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Santababs

This post is great — I’ve checked out a lot of other recommendations, and this is by far the most helpful posting! I am using a fabric wrap and ribbon for my invites instead of an inner envelope, and thus will not have a place to specify the names of children under 18. Can I include their names on the outer envelope in that case?

Many thanks!

 
16.
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Santababs

OH, sorry! Just finished reading your post and see that you mention it is ok to have their names on the outer, if no inner is used….thanks!

 
17.
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Laura @ Laura Hooper Calligraphy (message)  22 posts, Newbee

@Santababs: Thankyou! I try to take a practical approach to the traditional method of addressing using the art of calligraphy. Anywho, yes, you will need to include their names on the outer envelope since you don’t have an inner. Otherwise, they will have no way of knowing the children are invited.

I am currently working on an order for a client for whom we are creating a very elaborate Cabo themed invitation set, but it doesn’t have an inner envelope. Instead we are going to tie on a small tag on each that will serve the same purpose as the traditional inner envelope. The same thing could work for you if you want to tie tags on to your ribbon. Just a thought!

 
18.
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kate

What a wonderful post and perfect timing as I am currently starting to address my invites!
I have a quick question, I have a few guests who are retired military, since we are doing formal addressing how would that go? In all cases it is the man with the ranking. Thank you for any advice!

 
19.
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Habibi

Thanks Laura!

 
20.
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Jenni

This is so great! I have a question as well:

Is it ever appropriate to address to:
Mr. John and Mrs. Jane Doe

They share the same last name, they are married, the invitation is somewhat formal, but I prefer not to minimize the woman’s name with “Mr. and Mrs. John Doe.”

Thanks!

 
21.
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phruphru

Awesome post! Thank you so much.

Just curious — a lot of etiquette web sites out there say you address single women as “Miss Britney Spears.” I’ve never been a huge fan of “Miss,” but I am just curious as to if there’s a new rule about “Ms.” or if it’s just personal preference?

 
22.
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Miss Taffy

This post is so helpful!!! Thank you! :)

 
23.
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Dina

Hi, I just wanted to point out that lots of women today get offended if you address the letter to eg. Mr. and Mrs. Peter Smith.

 
24.
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Dina

@phruphru:
It is politally correct to use ‘Ms.’ for both married and unmarried women. The point of Ms. was to create a form of address which does not show whether the woman is married or not, as a feminine equivalent to Mr. You could therefore see it as a matter of politeness to use Ms.

 
25.
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Dina

@Laura @ Laura Hooper Calligraphy: @Laura @ Laura Hooper Calligraphy:
Hi Laura, I am afraid that is a common misconception.

‘Mrs.’ refers to a married woman.
‘Miss’ refers to an unmarried woman.
‘Ms.’ refers to a married or unmarried woman (as in Mr.).

The only politically correct form to address a woman is Ms.
Ms. was specifically created to have a form of address which matches Mr. for men, as Mr. does not indicate whether the man is married or not.

 
26.
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Laura @ Laura Hooper Calligraphy (message)  22 posts, Newbee

@Dina: Dina, Thanks very much for your insight. As the title of this post states, these are tips for traditional wedding etiquette. These are not rules that you must follow, you should feel free to address your envelopes in any way you like. After all, it is your wedding. However, there are many, many women out there who still find Mrs. to be perfectly acceptable and even welcome it. These are tips based solely on tradtion, that people ask us about everyday, so I write speaking to the greater majority of the women but am more than happy to address any other specific issues.

Keep in mind, that if you send your address list made up of 2 completely different names (ie, Mr John Smith and Ms. Jane Doe) on the first line of each address, your professional calligrapher may charge an additional rate for the extra words. We work out the fee per envelope based on estimates and that would drastically increase the number of words we are writing. Just something to be aware of, as many people are very aware of the cost of their wedding goods these days.

My own personal policy is to address the envelopes however the client prefers, without interpretation, so if my client prefers to write Ms. instead of Mrs. that is fine with me, and that is how her envelopes would be written. Usually I tell my brides to take their list on a case-by case basis, and address the envelopes to the people they know would be offended by “Mrs” in a different manner.

 
27.
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sarsk624

Maybe you did answer this question but I am confused:
I personally do not like the Mr. and Mrs. John Smith because I feel it minimizes the woman by dropping their first name.
My dad feels so strongly about it our invitations will read John and Jane Smith request the honor of your presence at the marriage of their daughter…

When addressing envelopes to my formal wedding are my only options:
Mr. and Mrs. John Smith
or
John and Jane Smith?

Is it that Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Smith wrong or could cost more?

What about Mr. and Mrs. John Smith outer
John and Jane inner?

I also thought Miss was reserved for women under the age of 18.

 
28.
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sarsk624

Sorry, I have another. What about a couple living separately? Do they each get their own invite? Or would it just be Mr John Smith on the outside and John and Jane on the inside

 
29.
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Member
cantabrigian (message)  176 posts, Blushing bee

How do you write the name of someone with a PhD?

Doctor John Smith, P.h.D.
Mr. John Smith, P.h.D.
John Smith, P.h.D.

 


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Laura @ Laura Hooper Calligraphy Laura Hooper, Northridge, CA Vendor: Calligraphy Website: Laura Hooper Calligraphy About Me: I've been practicing the art of calligraphy since the age of 12 and nothing gives me more pleasure than waking up each morning knowing I get to do what I do each day. I love having the ability to infuse my own personal style into each of my bride's special day. When I'm not working, I enjoy traveling, hiking, reading and painting; but most of the time I don't consider calligraphy to be work at all!
 
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