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Yes, people. It's a long story. But I'm going to tell the whole thing, because Husbone and I are headed to Nigeria on Monday, and it may be some time before I have pictures, and before I can dig in, really. So here it is. How I became a wedding photographer…

If you've heard around anywhere about the first year of marriage being difficult, it was. Very. Husbone makes me happier than anyone I have ever known. He makes me feel confident, special, loved, humble, and so very thankful for every single day. But that first year (and a half) or so was rough.

We fought about everything. I was angry, he was angry, and we had found ourselves in the unfortunate predicament of: I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life, and he was away on the road, doing what he always dreamed of doing. Maybe I was jealous. But whatever it was, it was not doing nice things for our relationship.

I married this man, because I knew that no matter what happened, I would fight for him. Epic style. But one day, Husbone was leaving for the road which he craved - and who could blame him for being relieved to go on his journey, because all I had for him, for a little while, was a big mountain of anger that overshadowed the through and through soul-mate love I have always had. And as the minivan pulled away, I was sad. Sadness triggers the chemicals in my brain which crave In-n-Out. California. Home. Sigh.

And so, to absolve myself of the oddity of buying a plane ticket only to have a burger, I enrolled in an acting workshop in L.A. I mean I was an actress. I had just finished doing Floaters, which got a lot of national press, and I thought. I thought I was an actress. And so I show up at this workshop, essentially a way for casting directors to find actors and vice versa. From the start they were all paying attention to me, which was such a breath of fresh air after being ignored by New York casting agents. I am Indian, somewhat ethnically ambiguous, and totally American. They LOVED me. And I tell you - I think I was a pretty good actress, but in the end, and in LA, talent matters less than what type you are. And I apparently, was very cast-able.

After a couple of days of meeting with casting directors, one morning I found three of the casting directors from the program are standing in the parking lot, hanging out. They caught my eye and waved me over. It was the casting directors for Lifetime TV, House and Scrubs. And proceeded to insist that I move to Los Angeles, yesterday.

I didn't know what to do! I desperately clung to my New York home, to my husband, spouted all kinds of stuff about my cats and responsibilities. But no, they pressed on. They made promises, they offered to introduce me to some people, to get me in the door.

What is a young actress to do? Years and years of striving in New York, I hate the train, I hate the cold, and the two forces together beat me back home all winter, fall and spring. I called Husbone. He said:

“Follow your dream. You always talk about being an actor, and this is your chance to really be one. We have the rest of our lives together, so why squabble over this time apart?”

He's my lobster.

And so I flew back to my NY home, and two days later, he dropped me off at the airport, and it was like a heaving nightmare. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't stop crying, I felt like I was making the wrong decision, but I had to do it. And all that anger I had instantly melted away in his arms. The absence of which made the whole world feel empty. We wrenched ourselves apart from our planetary gravitational forces and we had no IDEA when we would see each other again. I mean. My heart hurts just thinking about how overwhelming it was.

Are you ready for this? My FIRST audition in Los Angeles, as a new girl in town, was a one on one interview/audition with April Webster - the head casting director of my FAVORITE show of all time: LOST!

The audition was for the lead in an HBO pilot. I think I might have intentionally done a horrible job. I mean, an HBO pilot?? Could you imagine if I booked it; I would never be able to come back home! And this deep and torrential fear swelled inside me, at every Hollywood party, every audition, with every person I met. Because it was a whole world that was without my Husbone, my heart, my lungs. I cried myself to sleep every night.

And intermittently over 6 months or so, Husbone came to California. We had conversations about the future, which looked so bleak and lonely with no end in sight. We tried to plan trips every 4 weeks. It was getting expensive, and increasingly difficult to arrange. 4 weeks became 6 weeks, and became 10 weeks. And with each passing day without him, the more I felt like I couldn't breathe.

He did make a few trips out, and it was heavenly bliss. It was that same crazy feeling we had when we first met - when we would walk to the grocery store and he would suddenly grab me and kiss me for a while, and the whole world went quiet. It was like that again. It was an amazing, amazing place to be after all we had been through. Amazing. But then, he had to go back to New York, and it was harder and harder to say goodbye. I stopped going to the Hollywood parties all together.

And finally, 6 months of this torture passed. The thing with acting is, it's not something that you can just give a year to. It's a lifetime commitment, unless you have a crazy breakthrough and suddenly find yourself famous. And on a whim, I just bought a gosh darn ticket to see my man in New York. And it was amazing. It felt like home. I missed him so much.

It was time to go back to California. If you are wondering why I stayed for so long after so much torture, there's one thing you have to know. I've been an actress my whole life. I won all kinds of awards in high school, it was my dream, it was my identity. I had no idea who I was or what I could be if I wasn't an actress. And here was my husband, pursuing his dream, and here I was, holding on to a dream I had a long time ago for lack of better options.

I rolled out of bed, but I felt the invisible ties that bind pulling me back. I fought them off. I packed my bag, as Husbone watched from bed. I wanted to cry again - I had a lot of practice, anyway. I wrenched myself from the room and dragged my bag downstairs, awkwardly, and I stood in the Foyer for a moment.

Deep. Breath.

And I pushed through the doors, and I walked down the street, and I checked for my California house keys. Damn. I left them inside.

I returned. I left the bag at the bottom of the stairs and I trudged up the stairs. I went in the bedroom, and I saw this beautiful man in bed. And without a thought. Without hesitation. Without any reservation, a weight was lifted from my weary shoulders and I just got back in bed.

And I never went back. Not as an actress anyway.

And Husbone, in the following days made this point: “You talk about acting, you went to acting school, you move to LA to be an actor, but why then, do you ignore the fact that you sit in front of your computer 12 hours a day and look at wedding photos. I mean, we are already married, for goodness sake!”

And so. What to do with my life, was the order of business for the day. I searched craigstlist, and I purchased leads on Wedplan.net for $2 each and begged people to hire me. Photography, I thought. I have a camera. That's a start. And without any notion of what an aperture was, or what it does, without any understanding of focal lengths and their importance, I booked my first wedding. This was my portfolio: http://lonelypoo.squarespace.com/

And this was the lovely young woman who booked me:

And the thing about Dana and Chris, who I will never, ever forget is their LOVE. WOW. After having been through so much, I felt like, by the time I shot this wedding, being married was such a profound presence in my own life. The fight that we have for each other, Husbone and I made a decision to be together NO MATTER WHAT. And to know what that could possibly mean, to know how that can make you into a better person, to bind yourself with another singular human being out of these billions, I mean wow. What an amazing thing a wedding is. My family isn't very close, though I always longed for them to be. And here was this man, and he bound himself to me and we made a new family. And to be with two people to document that jumping off point is just miraculous to me. To cry from joy - at WORK! I mean, really - it's ridiculous. I shot my first wedding, and it felt like my whole life just clicked into place. I came home and I wept in Husbone's arms. He knew, and I knew. This was it. I found the love of my life. Twice. And I get to have them both at the same time.

And then of course, the rest is a brief history. Armed with only one wedding, I was accepted into the WPJA, from which Tara (Mrs. Tulip) on Weddingbee found me and posted some of my photos up on her blog, and Weddingbee. And then, I booked 30 weddings in the following three months, in three countries (that is, including this one). My readers went from three (thanks Victoria!!), to 200 in that time. And suddenly, I was something new. Something I never imagined. I was. I am a wedding photographer. I've never been more ecstatically thankful for every. single. day.