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As a bride, I must confess that I had my bridezilla moments.  I think even the most sane brides have their breaking point or a tantrum moment.  Having worked on hundreds of weddings, I’ve seen my share of disappointed brides.  When I think about all the time, money and energy spent on weddings, I often ask myself, how can a bride avoid disappointment even when they’ve selected a top notch team of vendors?  Having the best team possible in your budget is a good start, but there any more ways to prevent miscommunication, disappointments, and mistakes.

Communicate Specifics to Vendors, Create Timelines, and Provide a Contact List 

Often one of my clients forgets to send me basic information like where they will be the morning of the wedding.  Once I had a groom I couldn’t locate, and I ended up driving around the city with a bag of boutonnieres looking for my lost groom and his groomsmen.  Finally the nervous bride texted me that the group was at a particular hotel.  When I got there, I had to look for them in several places.  If I couldn’t find the groom and his groomsmen, all the photos would have been taken without their flowers!

One thing that would have helped is a contact list with cell phone numbers.  A time line would also have been helpful.  After that instance, I’m much more cautious and my staff always gets contact and timeline information from our clients.   

Here’s yet another scenario.  Early in my career as a wedding floral designer, I worked with a bride who had her sister in law plan her wedding.  This sister in law was great until the day of the wedding, when we found ourselves 7 centerpieces short because the table count was off.  If I had received a floor plan from the couple, this problem could have been anticipated.

Bottom Line: Never assume that any vendor knows where they are supposed to be.  Be sure to give them clear and useful information like contact lists, timelines, and floorplans.

Show Me The….. 

Instead of explaining what you want, if possible show your vendors what you are looking for.  Pink to me could mean light pink, dark pink, bubble gum pink, blush pink, coral pink, salmon pink.  Showing vendors what you mean is almost as important as communicating what you expect.  

My good friend, Anne Millett of Mira Aster works with a Pantone book.  Sabrina Moyle of Hello! Lucky also works with one.  At a recent design meeting, the bride requested red lettering and we made sure she selected the right red.  It was a good thing because Sabrina’s idea of red was very different from the bride’s, and we avoided a potentially huge mistake by making sure that the client showed us what she meant by “red”.  Color is one of those areas in which two people can see a color different.

When I used to work at the clothing store Bebe, I helped select color palettes and stories for tops.  The difference between a salable yellow and a markdown yellow was very small.  That’s why I know when it comes to flowers, you have to show vendors examples.  The same thing goes for the overall design.  What you mean by simple doesn’t always mean the same for a designer.  It might take a while but it’s important, so give specific examples through imagery to make sure everyone is on the same page, and ask to see specific examples.

Sketching is another good tool.  During meetings, I take notes but I also sketch images and designs.  I find it so much easier to draw what is in my head as opposed to describing it.  Here’s a recent sketch of an idea for a place card design:

Bottom line: Describing things is good, but showing vendors your likes and dislikes through visuals is best.

To Sample, To Not Sample

This is not a common practice, but I think ordering samples of a centerpiece is a good idea if the decor part of your wedding is key.  Brides and grooms want to know what they are getting in advance, and I completely understand why a client would opt to do this.  Send an email and give your floral designer ample time to make a sample.  When you see it, be honest with yourself. If it isn’t what you thought it would be, don’t panic.  Once again, communicate what you like and what you don’t like.  Also, keep in mind that looking at something up close is different than seeing it with linens and in a room.  If at all possible, see if your designer can meet you with the sample at the venue.  

Another way around a sampling session is actually going to a real wedding or event that your vendor has designed.  See how they setup.  Look at the flowers at a real event.  Note that this may not be possible, especially if it is a private event.

Now, before floral designers start getting mad at me because I’m suggesting this , I think there are advantages with sampling sessions.  I enjoy doing them because it gives me peace of mind that my client will be happy the day of. If you need your vendor to do this however, be ready to compensate them for their time and driving expense.  If the sampling session goes well, then make sure to ask your floral designer, if the real one will be the same size, in the same container.  Ask them what might look different.

Bottom line: Participate in the process of selecting your flowers and see the product in person if decor is essential to your peace of mind.

Plan for the Worst   

For many couples with outdoor or summer weddings, we might have to worry about rain or heat.  To avoid dying flowers in the heat, it is essential to avoid selecting flowers that are very delicate.  Hydrangea thrives in cooler temperatures. Fragile garden roses start to fall apart when it is extremely hot.  It’s the worst nightmare I have as a floral designer.  Sometimes I have to say “no” to a bride upfront about using certain flowers because I know they just won’t work. Even the most experienced and quality vendors won’t promise you that gardenias will not brown on a sunny, hot day.  

An alternative when a bride wants garden roses in her bouquet for a heated summer day, is to order a second bouquet.  Floral designers may just make a second bouquet for you, as I do from time to time.  Last summer for instance, a bride wanted her garden rose, sweet pea, and lisianthus bouquet 5 hours before the ceremony.  It was over 90 degrees with no humidity at noon, and by 3:00pm the sun was getting close to 100 degrees. If a bride was holding it for outdoor photos, I knew the chance that it would look great for the ceremony would be slim, so I made her a second bouquet. It was a very expensive thing to do, but I’m glad that I did it because I knew that the bridal bouquet was key.  I’m not advocating that brides order a second bouquet, but if you know it will be extremely hot, be prepared for the worst.  

I also like having backup plans for wind and rain.  My own wedding day in April 2000 was incredibly windy.  Our floral designer could not get the large arrangements placed on the outdoor courtyard because they kept “tipping” over due to high wind.  Finally Pico the designer decided to place them on the ground.  The guests didn’t notice, and in fact, I didn’t notice.  Pico’s staff was so worried that I would be unhappy, but the safety of our guests far exceeded my desire for flowers in the photos.  What if the large arrangements blew over and hit one of the attendants?  What if the wind knocked over the heavy urns and chipped the venue’s tiles?  There are so many what if’s and safety and practical cautions should outweigh decor at times. 

Bottom line: Plan for all weather issues in advance so that the day of event can be smooth.

I hope this helps.  As always if you have any questions, please feel free to ask!